When the Sunlight Shines by Stormi L. Willis I wipe the sleep from my eyes as we travel down the interstate on a much needed family vacation. Well, actually it is a visit to my mother and brothers house so it is a semi -vacation. My husband of sixteen years is at the wheel driving us safely, as he does much of our life; Keeping us safe in his hands. He has grown so much and I love him more every day.Our three children are in the back playing, arguing, and loving one another (although they wouldn’t admit it unless perhaps it was a matter of life or death). Pouncing on our heads and in our laps is our puppy, who a friend rescued form the side of the road and gave us when she wad only weeks old. She is the baby of the family and hops from one of us to the other, making us all feel like we are her favorite person. My children have also changed so much, grown so fast. Seems only weeks ago they were pooping and puking on me.It amazes me what the Lord does when He comes into a home and how He builds a loving family out of broken hearts and fragile pieces of lives. How is it that as I watch all this growth going on around me and feel such a difference in my own heart that I forget I am changing too? Not only on the inside am I growing in Christ, but o the outside, I am changing too.I pull out the mirror and see the image of a woman who I always expect to look so much younger (or older) depending on how I feel that day. Today I feel joyful, full of hope and there is an anticipated excitement in the air. But in the mirror when the sunlight shines on my face I look so aged. I see the creases and lines that show the days that I am not so joyful, days I battle with depression and loneliness. In the darkness of my room where I get ready and put on my makeup each day there is no sunlight, just manmade electricity and in manmade light (or in man’s eyes) many flaws and imperfections can be hidden.But this sunlight shining on my face through the window of the car shows it all. Every age spot, un-plucked hair and the start of wrinkles around my eyes. I become self conscious as I begin to pluck and pry to cover the blemishes, realizing that in the sunlight this is what people see everyday when they look at me. I cringe inside when I think of how I must look to my Savior when His Son lights on my face and feel like dying from shame when I contemplate His light in my heart where the light of His love shines o the seed He had planted there. No doubt He sees much worse than what I see on my face. Yet, He loves me in spite of my imperfections. In fact, He loves me in spite of the scars and wrinkles of the life I lived before He saved me although He no doubt knows the many sins and nastiness I have allowed back in this garden of the Heart since He saved me.I look back around in the car at my family and my heart swells with joy and love. I know their mistakes and failures, some of them have hurt me deeply, yet I can’t imaging anything they could do that would make me love them less. To think how much more He loves me so much more than I can understand or even imagine brings tears to my eyes nearly messing up the makeup I just applied reminding me again of how vain and temporary this life is. Why Jesus chose to come down from His throne in Heaven and leave His father for me although I am imperfect in every way, or that God would allow it, I can never understand. I am so very thankful though that I know I will get to be with them and understand one day.He must see something with that light of His that assures Him that He can make something worth loving out of this dirt he bought with His blood on the cross all those years ago. But for the life of me, this mirror I hold in my hand can’t find what it might be. No man made concealer can hide what I am from Him. Just knowing that one day when the Son light shines all over me He will find me perfect and without blemish makes me close my eyes to imagine one more time the joy I will see on His face on that day. All is well with my soul for this moment in time.
